Hair today, gone tomorrow

What a great country. I am writing this while traveling down the interstate at 85 miles an hour (Ed note: I am not driving) with the sun setting over the beautiful mountains to the west. My Verizon wireless card is enabling me to work (yes, I am swamped trying to complete a huge project) in to the evening without sacrificing on a scheduled climbing trip to southern Utah.

Mrs. Bald Man just informed me we will be stopping at a McDonalds to fill our ever expanding American bellies with fatty food served in land fill filling Styrofoam containers.

There is American brewed beer chilling in the cooler and those caps will be popped within minutes of arriving at our campsite. Life is good.

So what does a follicle challenged knee jerk conservative have to complain about? Perhaps it is the possibility of this great country being forever changed in a way that, just a few short decades ago, was considered impossible. Yeah, that seems knee jerky enough to warrant a few lines of text.

Much has been written, including on this blog, about our march to Socialism. I agree with recent pronouncements by Thomas Sowell that the march is to Fascism but who am I to split hairs when it comes to our parting ways with our country's capitalist roots. No matter how you style it, the future seems to be one that would turn the heads of our founding fathers prematurely gray under those wigs they were so fond of wearing.

It isn't just those of us on the right who see this. I've been combing through papers and websites that approach politics from the other side of the spectrum and there too comments are appearing regarding our move from a free market society. Of course, in many of these articles, the move is heralded as a good thing.

Even sources within our former top foe Russia acknowledge America is in a transitional stage. Read this from American Language Pravda and prepare yourself to be a little bit sickened in the realization the socialist press overseas is willing to report what the socialist press here in our own country refuses to.

S2

Breakfast is a prescription for health

Thanks to the Federal government, I know not to use my toaster in the shower, not to use the sleeper in the Winnebago while I am the driver and it is still moving down the highway and that those pills designed to enhance that certain part of the male anatomy haven't been scientifically proven to do so. With Big Brother looking out for us, what could possibly go wrong?

I tend to skip breakfast on a regular basis even though it has been stated the world over that this is the most important meal of the day. My initial food consumption every day consists of coffee or a big Rock Star and, if I am hungry, a fiber bar. I suppose I should supplement the caffeine boost with vitamins or the like but that seems like way too much to organize.

Now I guess if I have some morning cereal I will be killing two birds with one stone: a better diet and better drugs! In its infinite wisdom and ever increasing dalliance into our lives, the Feds, in the form of the Food and Drug Administration, have decided to view Cheerios cereal as a drug.

This decision has to do with claims of being a health benefit made by the little oat circle manufacturer. With this logic I guess the Power 90 DVD set, the hiking trail near my house and three glasses of water a day are next on the list of prescriptions my doctor will have to write.

S2

Being "Goode" is hard

I was extremely dismayed when I heard the news that the mostly conservative and completely animated Hank Hill was being cancelled. Creator Mike Judge was said to be launching a new cartoon show on ABC centered on an environmentally aware family. My heart sank. Well, fear not right thinkers. This show looks to be histerical and appropriately makes fun of the eco-nuts.

Check this out and set your DVRs:

Gotta be the shoes

In every organization there seems to be someone in a position of above average authority who spends his/her time making up things for people to do in order to justify their existence within the company. You can probably picture this person wherever it is that you work. I just hope it isn't you!

There has to be a herd of these organizational chart bloating hippos spewing CO2 into the offices of Homeland Security and the TSA. It is no secret I possess a Big Gulp size disdain for many of the so-called security hoops we are forced to jump through like Tu Tu clad Chihuahuas on an episode of America's Stupidest Videos. Most of them make no sense. I defy anyone to tell me "you just don't understand the whole picture or understand the real security measure". To that I call bull.

Four 3 ounce bottles of a liquid in a one quart bag is equal to twelve ounces of that liquid. Let me carry a damn water bottle!

I showed my driver's license and boarding pass to the bored looking personality devoid (except in Utah, they seem to be nicer there) watchdog not more that 15 yards away from the metal detector. Why is it I have to show it to the guy on the leeward side of the detector?

I wrote a few weeks ago about losing my 1 inch pen knife but that my 4 inch scissors went through uncontested. I'll bet I could even run around with them without drawing too much attention.

Today, at the Ontario, California airport, my well honed security line procedure was rudely interrupted by the latest nonsense sent forth from the Cathedral of Knowledge in our nation's capital. After showing my license, I put it away, get to the moving baggage way through the security tunnel of love and I grab two bins. Bin one gets my laptop, because nothing else can go in with it. Bin two is occupied by my projector and belt. My shoes come off and go in the carry on sleeve recently vacated by my projector and all goes off to be violated by Xray beams in the dark little box while a TSA voyeur looks for anything that looks like it might be dangerous...or fun.

I can complete all that faster than most parents can fold up the damn stroller they think they need to carry on the plane.

Today I was informed that a NEW procedure has been in place and now shoes must go directly on the moving belt. This really is no big deal. I put my shoes on the belt and watched them move along like the Cross Trainers of some defeated exerciser standing still on his treadmill. What irks me about this is the complete and utter stupidity of this change.

I am skeptical of the security advantage of taking our shoes off in the first place but now isolating them even more is ridiculous. I take the shoes off my feet and put them beside my belt on the moving belt while the second set of shoes I brought with me remain snug in my carry on bag not more than one foot behind them. This helps how?

I comply with these procedures only because of my desire to get from one place to another but if the TSA feels this instills anyone with a sense of confidence or security, they are deluded. The exact opposite is true. Most terrorists convey an image of more bravado (really cowardice but that is a different topic) than brains but I wonder if the same is true of those trying to catch them in the hallowed halls of Homeland Security.

Until the day comes when common sense returns, I will just make sure I wear socks without holes in them.

It isn't ADD. I prefer to say scatterbrained

I am in a hotel with a fairly slow internet connection so my research capabilities are somewhat limited. Granted, the fact I use the internet for research is a limitation in itself with regard to accuracy but, hey, this is a blog after all. So tonight, in an homage to the gang bangers populating the surrounding cities here in Los Angeles, I will do a drive-by posting of several articles that caught my eye today.

These guys have credibility why? - The scientists whose brains must be still frozen from the ice in the rink where they found the Hockey stick graph made famous by Al Gore are now saying Global Warming will cause the Earth to become cooler. Soon the United States will resemble one of those McDonalds sandwiches from the 80's with the cool side cool and the hot side hot.

Hypocrite, hypocrite, hypocrite, ignorant- Why do so many environmental fanatics constantly turn out to be living in a way completely removed from the way they want the rest of us to live? And then we have the President's environmental advisers showing they are about as adept at research as your average bald headed blogger by missing a very well publicized (and cited on this blog) Spanish report on how Green jobs are now all they are claimed to be. They probably didn't listen to Kermit saying it isn't being green either.

Staggering numbers here - Swine flu deaths in the United States have hit double digits. That is one more than 9.

There is a casting call for the part of Wesley Mouch - Ayn Rand continues to be proven a prophetic writer.

This vacation thing makes me sick - I am willing to bet Representative Alan Grayson has never run a business. He is proposing mandating a week's paid vacation for all workers, even part time ones. This dunderhead, whose common sense seems to be on its own permanent hiatus, thinks the week vacation will lead to less sick time being taken by employees. This from a guy who "works" in an outfit that takes several recesses a year.

S2

You won't be driving the road to socialism in a Chrysler

The following was forwarded to me by a co-worker. This dealership was a customer of my company's. We will be removing our equipment from them tomorrow.

Letter from a Dodge dealer

letter to the editor (Ed. No mention of the original paper was made)

My name is George C. Joseph. I am the sole owner of Sunshine Dodge-Isuzu, a family owned and operated business in Melbourne, Florida. My family bought and paid for this automobile franchise 35 years ago in 1974. I am the second generation to manage this business.

We currently employ 50+ people and before the economic slowdown we employed over 70 local people. We are active in the community and the local chamber of commerce. We deal with several dozen local vendors on a day to day basis and many more during a month. All depend on our business for part of their livelihood. We are financially strong with great respect in the market place and community. We have strong local presence and stability.

I work every day the store is open, nine to ten hours a day. I know most of our customers and all our employees. Sunshine Dodge is my life.

On Thursday, May 14, 2009 I was notified that my Dodge franchise, that we purchased, will be taken away from my family on June 9, 2009 without compensation and given to another dealer at no cost to them. My new vehicle inventory consists of 125 vehicles with a financed balance of 3 million dollars. This inventory becomes impossible to sell with no factory incentives beyond June 9, 2009. Without the Dodge franchise we can no longer sell a new Dodge as "new," nor will we be able to do any warranty service work. Additionally, my Dodge parts inventory, (approximately $300,000.) is virtually worthless without the ability to perform warranty service. There is no offer from Chrysler to buy back the vehicles or parts inventory.

Our facility was recently totally renovated at Chrysler's insistence, incurring a multi-million dollar debt in the form of a mortgage at Sun Trust Bank.

HOW IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA CAN THIS HAPPEN?

THIS IS A PRIVATE BUSINESS NOT A GOVERNMENT ENTITY

This is beyond imagination! My business is being stolen from me through NO FAULT OF OUR OWN. We did NOTHING wrong.

This atrocity will most likely force my family into bankruptcy. This will also cause our 50+ employees to be unemployed. How will they provide for their families? This is a total economic disaster.

HOW CAN THIS HAPPEN IN A FREE MARKET ECONOMY IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA?

I beseech your help, and look forward to your reply. Thank you.

Sincerely,

George C. Joseph
President & Owner
Sunshine Dodge-Isuzu

If you remember a few short months ago when I "hinted" at the possibility of eroding freedoms and a move toward, not a socialist, a facist state you will see I am not completely nuts. News this morning is that the United States Government will soon be, for all intents and purposes, running General Motors.

Time to go lay flowers on the grave of Free Market Capitalism.

S2

Bartender, I'll have a double down

Some men are born to greatness, some have it thrust upon them and still others have daddy's business to sell and then gamble away the vast fortune the old man worked so hard to amass.

Terrance K. Watanabe, heir to the Oriental Trading Company which he sold in 2000, lost an astounding $112 million in 2007 at Harrah’s casinos, including $94.1 million at Caesars Palace and $12.2 million at the Rio. Ignorance such as this usually manifests itself in the twitters of movie stars or the dinner conversations of Vice President Joe Biden.

Watanabe nearly broke even but he passed on the million to one shot of a woman having twins by two different men.

In his defense, Watanabe paid off all but $14.7 million and he was drunk at the time. Being drunk is now a perfectly acceptable excuse for nearly every act formerly considered wrong. You can make anti-Semitic rants and then get your girlfriend pregnant when drunk. You can shoplift, punch paparazzi and do all kinds of things. Surprisingly you can go to school commando in a short skirt on photo day and feign surprise when the yearbook photo page captures a bit too much smile all while perfectly sober.

Watanabe says the casinos plied him with liquor and drugs forcing him to make bad choices. Perhaps the bad choice was to guzzle gallons of booze from the cleavage cart with millions in chips in front of him.

Time to go lay some more flowers on the grave of personal responsibility.

DEALership or No DEALership

I spent a good portion of today at a GM dealership. This particular dealership is one of the top performers in their market and wasn't fearing the Federal Express van when it pulled in to the parking lot. The same couldn't be said for thousands of other automotive sellers across the country. To them, the Fed Ex guy was about as welcome as a sneezing Mexican immigrant worker in the back seat of the car pool Prius. You see, GM chose to send Dear John letters via overnight mail. I guess it is easier to deliver the "it's not you, it's me" line that way instead of over the phone.

Despite not being at risk, technicians in the service department couldn't help but continually search the web for news about other dealership's situation. Technicians seem to be worse gossips than the Tuesday afternoon neighborhood coupon swap/poker game woman's group.

I've never claimed to be smart so I may come as no surprise when I say I don't really understand what is being accomplished in these mass closings. Automotive dealerships are independent businesses. They are not assets held by the big three (or any other manufacturer) and their employees are not on any corporate payroll in Detroit. These closures are not reductions in expense. Closing them would be akin to Mary Kay telling their Pink Cadillac driving associates their services are no longer needed. Other than further eroding GMs share of the pink vehicle market, this severance would not save Ms. Kay anything. She'd only be limiting her distribution network.

The same is true of the actions being taken by GM and Chrysler. In fact, GM expects sales to further erode precisely because of this smaller network. They also claim most of the ejected dealerships are struggling businesses that would probably be closing soon anyway. Grandpa is slowing down a bit in his old age, too. Should we put him out of his misery now?

The Obama administration claims to not want to be in the Automotive Industry but I somehow feel this cut back of dealerships is partly being done to show Washington "look we are making progress"! Every day another article appears indicating further influence of The ONE's administration in the business world. Reading through them, it becomes painfully clear, these guys just don't get it when it comes to running any company. It is the Automotive Task Force driving many of the recent decisions by GM and Chryser; the dealership closings among them.

No figures are yet available on how many people will be put out of work with these closings but with nearly 3,000 dealerships going away with, I'd guess, around 50 employees each you can do the math. I am sure there is a master plan somewhere in which this decision makes sense. Perhaps it is a way to deepen the prospective pool for civil servants.

I tip my "cap and trade" him for Hatch

Odds are your Congressional representative is a narcissistic scum beholden to someone for getting him/her into office. It is harsh but true.

In the era of say anything, do anything to get your bill passed, it is nice to see a member of this dastardly den of deception speak the truth. The congressman recently elected to the district just south of where I live is one Jason Chaffetz. Mr. Chaffetz is proving to be a rose among thorns. I can only hope young Jason can avoid the influence peddlers pushing agendas that infect freshmen politicans faster than a swine flu bug traverses a Mexican cantina for his entire term in office.

I don't have much to add to this except to provide a link to a government report stating the hazardous impact cap and trade will have on our economy.

S2

It's good to be the King...err Queen

Mel Brook's brilliant "History Of The World, Part 1" movie contained a vignette where he portrayed King Louis at the start of the French Revolution. As he royally stepped through a series of excesses from playing chess with live people as the pieces to overflowing a Harvey Korman held, "wait for the shake", piss bucket Brooks exemplified perfectly how out of touch the elite can be. Brooks even gave Louie his own catch phrase, "Its good to be the King" that was usually uttered during a rutting motion behind the closest bustle bound maiden.

The Queen of all Media gave the commencement speech at Duke University on Sunday where she, most likely unwittingly, paraphrased Brook's characterization of the beheaded Frenchman saying, "It's great to have a private jet"! She quickly followed what would normally be seen as a let them eat cake utterance with the advice that you've not completed the circle of success until you have helped someone reach a higher place. Easy for her to say.

I, in no way, begrudge Ms. Winfrey her success. Rather, I herald it. I would love to emulate it but that doesn't seem likely. Howie has cornered the television market for extremely attractive, funny and eloquent bald headed men and Montel is waiting in the wings for a comeback so that ship has sailed.

What irks me is that, in describing her financial, rather than physical, largess, Oprah encourages up and comers to give away their hard earned gains to others. Charity is fine and we should give a hand up where possible but too often this advice is translated into a directive to provide a hand out. More people will be helped through success and entrepreneurship providing jobs and opportunity than will ever be helped through the redistribution of wealth by government or soup kitchen inspired hope. Oprah herself has provided livelihoods for hundreds on her staff and I am sure several of her staffs hoods were very lively. In fairness, she does walk the walk and is quite philanthropic but giving a car to everyone in her studio audience pales when compared to providing a secure job with a 401K and possible stock option.

Today's college graduate has been spoon fed a diet of social awareness and citizen of the world pablum from his earliest days of napping in a circle in kindergarten to avoid anyone being single out as first in line. What they need to hear as they embark on their road to retirement is how to weather the storms of an increasingly unstable and over regulated business environment to make for themselves an oasis of success. They don't need to hear how any portion of their work is the property of someone else.

I've one other small complaint about Ms. Winfrey's private plane remark. Jetting off from Chicago for a weekend at her Southern California home in Gulfstream comfort is fine so long as you don't lecture the rest of us about our carbon footprints. It seems that when it comes to "walking this walk", she is doing so at 30,000 feet.

S2

NFW. She didn't do it.

I got to sleep some nights feeling I've spent all day staring that the two inch square screen of my BlackBerry writing and answering dozens of emails and text messages. I've heard the device can be used as a phone as well but I am not certain I'll get to that functionality before the buttons are unreadable as the lettering has been worn off.

I am getting to the point, especially with the advent of intuitive typing (the completion of words before you actually type them based on a large dictionary stored in the BlackBerry), where I can whip out a fairly coherent message in less time than it takes a Trekkie to get to his seat and start a conversation in Klingon with his fellow geek on opening night of the latest Gene Roddenberry inspired flick. And I am slow compared to most teens, tweens and drug dealers and yesterday I asked a co-worker to schedule a meeting in kilt instead of July because, well, the keystrokes to type both words are the same. I pray he doesn't show in his Tartan colors.

I can't swallow the claim made on a Sacramento TV station's web site of a teen bragging she sent 300,000 text messages in one month. The math just doesn't calculate. There is no possible way this could be done. I am not going to do the cyphering for you there Jethro but, when you actually put pen to paper, you will see the reporter didn't put two and two together to arrive at a hoax. IMHO this girl and her BFFs are ROFLTAO at the dweeb from TV and, since mom is quoted in the story, there was a POS the whole time who is in on it.

More distrubing, the story fails this perfect opportunity to comment on the destructive potential this type of activity has for society. Interpersonal communication, rather than being enhanced by texting is suffering. You can't possibly convey cogent and complex thoughts to another person when your text is limited to 165 (or so, I don't really know the actual number) characters per message. I guess that is why in most real life conversations between teens they don't even say "Oh My God!" they use the letters O M G. For real! I kid you not.

Schools are finding it difficult to curb text messaging during classes. I am wondering if they should. It seems the ability to use an I-PHone is now a pre-requisite for college!

S2

These guys are taking over the world?

It seems Google is everywhere. In fact, nobody "searches" the internet, they Google things! The environmentalist billionaires who run the company have their own corporate jumbo jet tricked out with the latest in high tech toys.

Not content with simply buying carbon offsets (SCAM!)to assuage their globe trotting guilt, the folks over at Google are doing their part to help the Earth by wrangling up 200 goats to trim the lawn at corporate headquarters.

I know this sounds far fetched but it has to be a true story. Just Google it if you don't believe me. Or head over to Google's official blog.

S2

Because you can't eat just one

After a big Paul Prudhomme inspired meal tomorrow night, Mrs. Bald Man and I are starting a 90 day workout and diet regimine coincidentally called Power 90. So tonight and tomorrow the chips and candies will be flying.

Sometimes I feel a bit OCD with food. I get that same way with blogs and internet news sites. I can't stop going from link to link in search of interesting tid bits. That, of course, often makes it difficult to pick a single topic for a nightly blog. I am not creative enough to run from topic to topic with quips and comments on each. Well, a planned divergence of topics that is; I can scatter my thoughts and digress with ease. Tonight has proven particularly difficult as there are a few stories worthy of comment though none are expansive enough for 500-1000 words. That, and Mrs. Bald Man is ready to watch NCIS, our current obsessive practice, on Fancast.com. You might have to follow the links for some of the comments to make sense. Others have no chance of making sense no matter what you do.

The flu formerly known as swine continues to make headlines for reasons even less understandable than the daily analysis of Lindsay Lohan's lesbian love life. A United Airlines flight from Munich to Washington (no mention of DC or state was made in the article) was diverted to Logan International after a female passenger complained of flu-like symptoms. Odds are it was the extra serving of schnitzel she swiped from the Aryan descendant sleeping in the exit row across from her. Claims were made that the crew felt she needed immediate medical attention and they feared the safety of the other 245 passengers on board. Folks, this is not Ebola we are dealing with; it is a flu bug! Please get a grip. Hundreds of schools are being shut down across the country depriving our kids of an education. There were more gang members arrested in a raid in San Diego than have the flu in the entire country of Australia. Perhaps we should shut down places where gang members congregate instead of schools. Oh wait....


Hudson River Emergency Landing

Evidence continues to mount that the Global Warming scare Al Gore is so fond of is nothing but crap. Sure, the chubby former VP with the huge personal carbon footprint carries around a list of 2000 "scientists" who ascribe to this theory. I wonder how many of these guys signed that list.

As the Global Climate change fanatics continue their march toward power through intimidation and shame, I am surprised that I am, for once, on the cutting edge. Mrs. Bald Man and I have killed all our grass, on purpose this year, and are Xeriscaping our front yard. Who'd have thought I would be the first in my neighborhood to remove a sign of moral decadence?

Blake Benson, a 17 year old Denver area high school student, won't be facing charges for the NOBAMA T-shirt incident. It seems Mr. Benson wore the shirt and carried a sign supporting then candidate John McCain at a rally where the now fashionably dressed First Lady Michelle Obama was appearing. In a move that gives lottery ticket buyers across the country hope in beating the odds, the ACLU actually defended the young Republican. What the story doesn't focus on but should is "why the hell was this kid arrested in the first place?" Maybe he had on the wrong shoes.

Finally, in the I got mine category, the First African American First Lady made a bit of a social faux pas when she showed up to speak to the huddled masses at a Washington, DC food bank wearing $540 shoes. The comfy, very high end sneakers seemed a bit out of place on the stage at eye level before the crowd of camera phone carrying poor people. I wonder if Bo the dog will get a chance to chew on those?

Tomorrow is the final binge before the natural purge. See you Monday.

S2