Hey palm readers, talk to the hand

As predicted, it didn't take long for the mainstream media news corpse (sic) to bury in the body of their print and verbal reports any mention of yet another verbal gaff by The ONE (see previous blog post here). Instead, the issue (sic) that has them wringing their hands in gleeful anticipation of delivering a left-winged and left-handed bitch slap to the Tea Party faithful is the fact Sarah Palin wrote a few crib notes on the palm of her hand when delivering a speech and answering a few questions.



Harry "the voice" Shearer opened his interview on Keith "the self-absorbed feaux male" Olbermann's show with a palm-reading joke. No sooner had the ink dried on Ms. Palin's palm and the Huffington Post grabbed on to the topic and devoted a bunch of digital ink to covering it. Chris Matthew's off handed remarks aren't even worth mentioning and Andrea Mitchell on CNN stepped way outside the bounds of journalistic neutrality with a rambling shtick of "callouts" that had her co-reporters (sic) giggling like the schoolgirls who usually resort to such hand writing on final exam day. Perhaps the examination all of these intellects (sic) should undertake is in to the depths of their angst over anything Palin.

There are supposedly two main issues at hand with Palm-gate. On one is the fact Sarah Palin blasphemed the anointed one by pointing out his unprecedented use of the teleprompter for everything from political speeches to grade school presentations to ordering a hot dog with Dijon mustard and Giardiniera (which he reads as "Garden era"). [ED Note: yes this is an alternative spelling of Jardiniere] Once it was pointed out that the hand notes in question here were not for her speech but were little reminders for the question and answer period of the conference, the gloves came off. I guess the recorders of fact (sic) for the mainstream (sic) media forget that Obama actually used teleprompters to answer "off the cuff" pre-screened questions during a press conference right after his election.

On the other hand, it is being stated that the hand written palm notes are further evidence of the former Governor's lack of intellect. She can't even remember five words? When are these talking head, scripted and intern reliant denizens of Mensa (sic) going to realize their questioning of anyone's intelligence is the pot calling the kettle black?

The root of this latest scandal (sic) to rock the beltway is that it is another example the media working left hand in glove with all things Obama; or more accurately all things anti-Palin. I've not raised my hand to jump on the Palin for President band wagon but she deserves better than the back handed and sick way she is being treated.

I guess making fun of a broad and her hand is worth two shots at Bush.

S2

This really shouldn't take that long

Why is it that the simplest things seem to take so long?

Mrs. Bald Man and I started to Xeriscape our lawn last year and, embarrisingly so, it is nowhere near being done. I am making progress but, you'd think, killing grass, grading the area, putting down some weed retarding, sorry that should be weed developmentally challenging, material and covering this will rocks and wood chips wouldn't be a several month undertaking.

Sometimes, like the final weigh ins on the Biggest Loser, events that you'd think would be as quick as Dennis Miller's wit end up dragging on like a Keith Olbermann self-aggrandising rant and, like said rant, seemingly degrade with each passing minute.

Such is the case with the so-called pirate hostage situation off the Somali coast. The situation is more "rub a dub dub Islamic terrorists in a tub" than "yo ho ho and a Johnny Depp look-alike with rum" in which four of these eye-patchless pirates are in a 28 foot life boat holding the captain of an American vessel hostage while the 565 foot 9100 ton USS Bainbridge sits idly by. It is not like we hadn't seen this coming!

FBI negotiators are on the scene and calls for reinforcements have gone out by both sides. The staring contest continues and the situation will surely escalate when more party guests arrive.

Like Rutger's chance at a NCAA Football championship, this should have been over before the first kickoff. The four want to be Blackbeard's are in the sights of Navy sharpshooters who, with the application of a few foot pounds of finger pressure could send them all to Davey Jone's locker while simultaneously providing a well balanced lunch for a school of Ahi tuna.

What about the safety of hostage Richard Phillips? It seems Phillips has had enough of his captor's company. He took a swan dive, more like a belly flop, from the boat in an escape attempt. Why this was not seen as the perfect opportunity to put a few dings in the dinghy and holes in the pirates is beyond me.

The longer this situation goes on, the more likely it will end with either the Captain being murdered or, almost worse, the US government dropping a boatload of cash into the boatload of pirates. If the latter occurs, you can bet your parrot there will be a flotilla of peg legged Somalis catching the first available trade wind toward the closest US ship.

This should end now and it should end decisively. Why the First African American President of the United States has no comment on this situation is beyond me. Yet again, we are signaling weakness in the eyes of the world. There is a time for negotiation and there is a time for action. This scum, who are making a very good living terrorizing innocents, have nothing to bargain with. They are out of gas and at the mercy of the tides. Mercy is not a trait they have exhibited in the past and it is not something we should endeavor to provide them. It's time to send a message in a bottle to these refugees from the human race that we, the civilized of society, can't have the ships of our fortune boarded at will and the treasure of our hard earned bounty seized. We need to drop anchor and take the wind of of their sails by dropping a few pirates.

Ahoy.

S2

Impossible odds? No just unimaginable arrogance

I got home from work with a headache and made the mistake of getting in to bed with my laptop but no television remote. To my dismay, the TV was tuned to MSNBC and the Keith "I am an arrogant, egotistic blowhard whose lack of depth perception extends beyond my visual acuity into my political beliefs" Olbermann show.

It has been 38 minutes and I have yet to agree with a single thing this squinty eyed pretty boy talking head has said. Not one word. I doubt him when he says he will be back after brief messages. In fact, if the remote was closer at hand, I can guarantee he wouldn't be back.

Amazingly, about a third to a half of this show has been spent on continuing the bashing of George W. Bush that has gone on for years on MSNBC. Truly this is a derangement that this network in general and this so-called anchorman in specific has. (My doubt is not that he is an anchor it is that he is truly a man.)

I am at the point where it I can't take it anymore. Time to turn off this drivel and put something a bit more cerebral on. I think MTV's Rock of Love might be on.